Letters From the Womb

We Chose Life – A Lifetime of Love in Three Days

admin — Mon, 30 May 2011 08:08:50 +0000

Dear Parents,

In 2002 we were thrilled to learn that we were pregnant with our fourth child, Marissa Elizabeth. This special blessing confirmed a decision we had made prior to that pregnancy to have my husband’s vasectomy reversed. You see, shortly after the birth of our third child, we decided my husband should have a vasectomy. Several years later after coming back full force to our faith, we decided that we had made a mistake and that he should have the vasectomy reversed. So we were ecstatic about the news of the pregnancy four months after the surgery!! However, our joy turned to sorrow when we discovered in the fifth month of the pregnancy that our daughter had a genetic disorder, Trisomy 18, which meant that she would not survive. We were devastated. After learning of the news and crying together and with our families, we accepted God’s decision. It was His will, and even though we were overcome with grief, we trusted in His decision to send her for only a short while. We were asked if we wanted to terminate the pregnancy and told them that “only the Lord gives life and only He can take it.” We continued with the pregnancy but didn’t know if she would die in utero, live for an hour, a day, a month, a year. Do we buy a crib or clothing for her? It was so difficult buying things for her knowing she might not even use them. At the same time, we made arrangements for her funeral, which we knew was inevitable. We prayed fervently, along with many, many family and friends that she would survive and be born alive so that we could hold her and tell her how much we loved her. We decided that, if we were allowed the gift of her live birth, we would provide her with comfort care only which meant that we would not subject her to any needles, testing, surgery or the like until the Lord decided to take her home. We would make her as comfortable as possible while she was with us. So after four months of anticipation and prayer, we were blessed with her live birth. She was a very fragile and tiny little 3 lbs.12 oz. baby girl – but she was alive. For three days we showered her with love, and hugs and kisses. We told her bedtime stories, and sang songs to her. We crammed a lifetime of our love into three short days. All of our family and friends came to see her. And even though we all knew she wouldn’t be staying, we knew it was God’s plan, that He had a good reason, and we trusted in it. We were honored that He had picked us to be her parents to take care of her during her brief stay. Three days after she was born, our daughter died in our arms. And though we were devastated to lose her, we share a profound joy in knowing that she is in heaven. God gave us a life and even though it was for a short time, we will never forget her and our love for her will always be with us.

Love,
Gina & Jesse

Mother’s Story – Video of Her Pregnancy Journal

admin — Sat, 28 May 2011 00:37:44 +0000

Great moving Video of a mother’s story as she presents her journal on Video. Presented by the mother and her now 18 year old son. Worth a watch.

Casa Teresa is a non-profit residential facility for pregnant single women who have no other place to call home. The staff and volunteers at Casa Teresa work to ensure that each new mother and child begins their life together in a stable, caring environment. This video is used to orient prospective residents and donors. Visit Casa Teresa online at www.casateresa.com.

Daddy’s Girl – Story of a Man who changed his career to fight for children of disabilities

admin — Tue, 10 May 2011 15:16:07 +0000

I am the father of a beautiful 7 year old daughter Chloe who has Down syndrome. EP Magazine recently did a story about my journey, and I think it would be very inspiring to families expecting a child with Down syndrome and let them choose not to abort.

I Chose Life – Autistic Child That Teaches Me Something New Every Day

admin — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 22:13:14 +0000

My story is a long one. But one that I am more then willing to share. It might at first seem irrelevant and with somethings I share they very well might be but at the end of my story I think you might understand a little more why I will go into details.

June, 2004 my daughter Raina is born. Seemingly perfectly healthy. Us all thinking she was only 2 weeks early. Even though she weighed only 5 lbs and was 17.5 inches long we never put the pieces of her tiny size together. She was a good baby my Raina. But then at 1 1/2 months she started to sleep more and more. I had to wake her up to eat when before she was scheduled very well to eat every 3 hours. She started to spit up when she never had before and when I would change her clothes or bathe her she would turn blue. After about a little over a week of this…I took her into the Doctors. After 7 hours of tests all ranging from CAT Scans, to ECG’s, to chest ECHOS, to X-rays, blood work, ect it was determined she had a Cooarctation of her Aorta. If you don’t know what that means…it’s a narrowing of the major artery in your heart. We were flown down to Vancouver, BC where they did heart surgery 3 days later. Over the next year, Raina was required to take digoxin everyday 3 times a day. Blood work was required every few weeks to make sure the digoxin was doing its job. She had to be weighed every month, she had to have countless ECG’s and chest ECHO’s done. 2 times in that year her cardiologists came to see us and she was still required to take her medicine till she was 13 months old. Since she was 14 months old I noticed she had terrible balance. She could never stand completely still. When she tried she would fall over. She runs into things on a regular basis and stubs her toes on anything within range. I started to take her into the Doc’s at about 15 months about her GAIT but none seemed too concerned. At 2 years of age I noticed there were things about her that seemed off. She started to line blocks up by color, throw temper tantrums worse then normal 2 year old behavior, repeat every single thing she heard over and over, fidget and move all the time and she always had to touch something. Her temper seemed abnormal and so did her eye contact. I started to take her to Doc’s steadily. All of which were saying that it was a phase she would grow out of. Most didn’t believe me when I told them her sleeping patterns.

It took me hours to get her down for the night. I would try at 7:30 and she wouldn’t be sleeping till close to 1 a.m and would be awake again at 3 or 4 a.m. Over the next 4 years, she has went through multiple hearing exams, GAIT testing, Doctors apts, Cardiologist Apts, Eye exams, blood work, CAT Scans. I have spoken to Child Therapists, Psychologists and Physiotherapists for her progressing problems. We had not had a determination until she went into Kindergarten. We finally made progress. She underwent more testing. After a few months she was diagnosed with High Functioning Autism. For those of you who do not understand this she is extremely intelligent but has multiple characteristics of an Autistic Child. She will repeat the same sentence 20 times, she remembers lines from movies shes seen only once before and plays them in her games, she goes into her own world where she rocks back and forth in her play time, she color coordinates everything she comes into contact with and everything must be perfect. There is so much more but it is so complex it would take days to explain. We are currently waiting on a Support worker and mental health worker to help Raina and myself over come her challenges. I have 2 other children. A 2 year old daughter and a 3 month old son. One day when I was crying my eyes out for the hard life Raina has had…and has yet to face I came to a conclusion. I got a tattoo of all my children names on my back and in and around them I got the Autistic Symbols of puzzle pieces and underneath in Raina’s printing I got “We can Overcome”. Not just the challenges she faces but also with the unknown pieces life with always throw in your path. I tell you our story because no matter what happens with your children, they always have something to teach you, to show you and to open your eyes to see where you were once blind.

A lot of people I know agree with aborting a child you know might have an illness and I think to myself “Why? My daughter has went through so much and it has taught me patients, understanding, tolerance and above all strength.” Every day is a challenge to most, and to some its never ending. My children and most of all Raina have taught me that no matter what there is in life..there is always unconditional love for one another. I am forever grateful for my children. Everyday is a blessing…with or without these challenges. Thank you for reading my story. I hope that for anyone who thinks of aborting a child due to illness or hardships..this helps you to think twice before deciding. I know that in my life there will never be anyone like my kids and I could never ask for more. They are the reason I breath. I love you my babies…forever more.

I Chose Life – You Are So Beautiful

admin — Mon, 01 Nov 2010 23:37:55 +0000

You Are So Beautiful

Son, you will thankfully never know the circumstances surrounding the months you spent growing in my belly. But you will always know that you are loved; that life is what you make of it; and that God is good.

I didn’t tell Daddy till I knew that your heart was beating and you were growing. Your cousin went with me to the OB/GYN to see, and at six weeks you were quite the peanut! I saw the heartbeat and smiled. Then, the OB called us into his office and explained that the sonogram either indicated an abnormally small sac or just a shadow; only time would tell, but I should not be surprised if I started to miscarry. I have never miscarried that I know of and was terrified.

Finally I gave a card to Daddy so he would know another baby might be coming. It did take him a few hours by himself but then he came up and gave me a hug. He even went to the next sonogram, which showed that the sac had grown normally!

I have never been so relieved.

Then, when I was just a little over two months along with you, my husband went to jail for beating me up. A day later I was in a car accident. I am lucky it did not affect you in the least. Although I did not want to be in the vulnerable position that pregnancy brings, I ALWAYS wanted you. Your daddy does too, he was just really stressed out. Neither of us planned to have five children but it really shouldn’t have been such a surprise!

Now Daddy dotes on you, he calls you “Mr. Handsome” and asks your siblings to help out so I can spend extra time nursing you. You eat so well!
Your sisters were so excited that my belly was big with baby. They kissed my belly and are still loving on you like mother hens!

Your birth was truly wonderful, it was such a transformation. Each (natural) contraction was so empowering and I couldn’t wait to meet our nine month miracle. The pushing part was insanely painful, my only Pitocin-laden birth without drugs, but worth it. I knew exactly what my body was doing and where you were. Your heartbeat stayed so strong. I will never know why God has blessed me, of all people, with such healthy babies & pregnancies; but I am grateful, for it gave me enough energy to focus on pulling our family back together.

Everyone now is much healthier than in a long time and you, darling, are a smiley happy baby. Sisters even protect you from your toddler brother, who cannot decide if he likes you messing with his toys.

God is mighty, indeed.

Love,
Your mama

I Had an Abortion – The Doctor Also Sucked the Life Out of Me

admin — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 20:06:04 +0000

Up until I was a senior in high school saving myself for marriage was VERY important. At this time in my life that was probably the only good thing I hung onto. I was a party girl, loved to hang out with friends and drink until we were so drunk that we didn’t even know where we were. Towards the end of my senior year I was at a party, very intoxicated and a much older guy who I knew date raped me. This incident made me loose total respect for myself and my body and sex became the way I got guys.
When I got to college, I didn’t stop. It really didn’t matter to me who I had sex with. I had several one night stands, many time several different partners in one week. I really thought this was how life was to be. When I look now at that point in my life I realize that God was with me then. He was keeping me safe, not me. My parents and family had no idea what I was doing, and my friends really didn’t’ either. I think now of Hebrews 13:5 “for He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee”, and He didn’t he kept his promise to me since that day in Elementary school when I asked him to be my savior. I was running but God was holding on to me every step of the way.
At the end of college I had settled down a little. I had met a very nice, handsome guy at a bar, I thought this could be the person that I might actually settle down with. I was graduating from college with a job in my degree. Life was good. Until – I found out the dream guy was married and I was pregnant.
WOW- what a blow. I could not and would not tell my family. I had nowhere to turn. The only option for me was Abortion. Of course the married man offered to pay for the procedure. So I decided to take my child’s life.
I wish I would have known that when the doctor sucked my baby’s life out of me that he would also sucked the life out of me too.
For the next several years I lived in shame, anger, regret and guilt. I had managed to find a wonderful husband who loved me despite my past. We decided that we were ready to have kids and I got pregnant very quickly. I was so excited but that excitement turned to sorrow. I had a miscarriage. I just knew that God was punishing me and that I deserved this. But God eventually did bless me with two beautiful children.
On January 4, 2004 I turned in my shame, and guilt for salvation. After this I still had a very hard time forgiving myself. I knew that God had forgiven me, but I could not let go, I felt like letting go was like forgetting that I had done, and I didn’t want to forget. I had felt that God was telling me that he wanted me to open up about my abortion. I can remember thinking, “no sir, not me!”
On November 10, 2008, God opened my eyes. A very good friend had a miscarriage. I ran to her side to comfort her, not knowing that I would have to pick up her son, a 14 week old fetus. At this very point in time God opened my eyes and I realized that I need to move on, and take my story and use it for his glory.
A few months later I started a bible study called Surrendering the Secret, Healing the Heartbreak of Abortion. This study has forever changed my life.
This study helped me to accept Gods forgiveness and now instead of thinking of lost child with regret and pain, I think of him with love.
Since this study I have shared my story several times, something that I never thought I could do. Every time I share my story my heart heals. I know now that the abortion is not who I am it’s just a part of my life story, a story that is full of God’s grace, mercy and forgiveness.
My life verse is Deuteronomy 30:19, “I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live”.
I choose life, not just the life of an unborn baby, but I choose life for me. A life that will be pleasing to God and in hope that one day I can help someone else choose life. I don’t ever want to forget the place God has brought me from, and as long as I can I will share my story because I believe that this if the life God has chosen for me.

I Had an Abortion; My Choice to Abort Has Changed My Life Forever

admin — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 20:52:31 +0000

I regret the Roe vs. Wade decision with everything that is in me. It bought into the lie that abortion was a woman’s choice, and that it was an easy solution to a “problem”. My devastating choice to abort has changed my life forever. I not only killed my children, but my grandchildren. I was foolish, and in my 20′s and did not realize the long term effects. I convinced myself that I had to finish school, and that a baby would interfere with my life and embarrass me because I was not married. Another time I was working in my career, and again I convinced myself that a baby would embarrass me because I was not married. I have lost my career, and I am unable to work. People ask me if I have children, and I’m embarrassed to say no. They have kids and grandchildren, and they show me their pictures. I have no husband either. Now many feel sorry for me.

The shedding of innocent blood brings a curse. I thought that I would get married and then have kids, but it never happened…

Pro-Life Commercial Cencored by ABC

admin — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 15:16:39 +0000

In 2008 this commercial was censored by ABC. Watch the commercial. there is nothing in the commercial that was untrue or attacking, yet we can not show this on t.v. Unbelievable. What we can show on TV and what the networks refuse to show.

Report shows $1 billion in US taxpayer money has gone to abortion industry

admin — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 18:00:43 +0000

Washington D.C., Jun 17, 2010 / 07:27 am (CNA).- A report released by the non-partisan Government Accountability Office (GAO) reveals over $1 billion in U.S. taxpayer money going to organizations that promote or provide abortions, including Planned Parenthood. Pro-life leaders have responded to these findings by calling for Congress to change their policies on federal funding.

The 33-page report was requested by Rep. Pete Olson (R-Texas), and strongly supported by Rep. Chris Smith (R-NJ), the co-chair of the House Congressional Pro-Life Caucus, as well as other members of Congress.

The report discovered that six organizations connected to the abortion industry received over a billion dollars in federal funds between 2002 and 2009. The organizations include Planned Parenthood Federation of America, International Planned Parenthood Federation, Population Council of the United States, Guttmacher Institute, Advocates for Youth and Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States.

Planned Parenthood Federation of America alone received $657.1 million in federal funding.

“A significant portion of federal taxpayer funding for domestic activities was provided through grants under the Title X program which provides grants for family planning,” stated Rep. Smith’s press release. “This program provides a funding source that helps abortionists set up clinics that do family planning in one room and abortion in the next.”

At a news conference on Capital Hill this morning, Olson and Smith joined other members of Congress to discuss the GAO’s findings.

“Planned Parenthood’s founder Margaret Sanger said, ‘The most merciful thing that the large family does to one of its infant members is to kill it,’” said Smith.

“No one ‘kills it’ more efficaciously and in such huge numbers – over 300,000 dead babies each year – as Planned Parenthood Federation of America.”

Click Here to Read the Entire Article

I Had An Abortion – The Biggest Mistake of My Life

admin — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 15:35:54 +0000

I don’t even know where to start, little less then a year ago I found out I was pregnant. I was with my boyfriend for about 6 months. Ever since I was younger I’ve always been pro-life and against abortions. I wrote papers and told my parents and pretty much anyone who knew me that I would never get an abortion. Well, the love of your life has a stronger influence then you think.

I will never forget that day that I found out I was pregnant, I felt like my world came crashing down… I told my boyfriend right away that I was pregnant I cried. He just looked at me. Of course the only thing that came out of his mouth was that I’m getting an abortion and what would his mom think, all about him. I had no one to turn too, I didn’t want to tell my parents even though I know they would support me but I felt like I let everyone down. I know I was too young to care for a baby but to me their was a reason why I got pregnant she was suppose to be on this earth. My poor baby didn’t even have a chance. October 26th 2009 I had the abortion little did I know I just made the biggest mistake of my life.

EVERYDAY I think about my poor baby and how I killed her the regret lives with me everyday, it’s so hard to be around little children cause I think of what she would have looked liked. I had her inside me for 3 months and a bit. I loved her already the face I would never get to see. I am still with my boyfriend we are coming up to our 1 year and 6 months… I look at him with hate all the time because he made me do it. I know its hard to imagine your life with a little baby when you are young yourself but put it up for adoption if anything. Don’t spend the rest of your life regretting this decision. I have now been on anti depressants for 5 months trying to help me cope and I talk to someone, but its never going to be enough. My mom also had an abortion when she was 22 she is now 51 and still regrets her decision. So really think about your options. Don’t spend the rest of your life regretting the murder of your baby like I do.